To the better of whom I am !
Because
I know that my actual problems weight on my shoulders is getting heavier. And
sometimes these problems drain me and choke me; and I know too that they are
blocking me from taking the energetic decisions and positive initiatives that
may most probably change
my life for good.
As I know nobody until today was able or willing to give me the help that I needed, as nobody has ever tried to understand me and my problems, and therefore no one could find the true solutions to solve them.
Or maybe they did try, but never had the patience to concur it .. left me in the middle of the road..
And yet, I know that secretly I still have those hidden things inside me, all the huge possibilities required to face these difficulties. Despite that, I’m still feeling this "violent block" that impede me from acting to obtain what I’m entitled to expect from life.
Still, what I have been able to see through my past, is that great deceit that still affects me. It is that deception, that I may have long forgotten, this deception caused by people I had so much affection for, this deception that is still in my today.
This profound deception has marked all my life, like a wound that's still bleeding and is wide open. It hurts me real bad even today, especially since I don't consciously relate to this painful past. And so there is a great bitterness that lays in me and invades my spirit.
This ancient pain, not healed, it’s more like a deadly poison much more serious than one can imagine, a deadly poison that paralyzes you and annihilates your faculties against difficulties. This is one of the fundamental reasons of my lack of positive personal potential and this is probably the real cause of all my current problems.
And yet I sometimes have some great moments of enthusiasm, but they are followed by hideous moments of profound discouragement. This is the sign where my past is trying to play tricks on me. I really have to eradicate these negative influences from my life if I want it to change, and for that I have decided to let go.
One has to say “ the more you live in unhappiness the more you attract misfortune.”
And for that I must let go of all the past, bad and good ! as I can’t risk it anymore. I really need to change to the better of whom I am ! I have to let go of the negativity winning over my true potentials !
To the better of whom I am ..
Well
this efficient and positive support that I’m pleading for, isn't what I truly
need to be seeking!
As I know nobody until today was able or willing to give me the help that I needed, as nobody has ever tried to understand me and my problems, and therefore no one could find the true solutions to solve them.
Or maybe they did try, but never had the patience to concur it .. left me in the middle of the road..
And yet, I know that secretly I still have those hidden things inside me, all the huge possibilities required to face these difficulties. Despite that, I’m still feeling this "violent block" that impede me from acting to obtain what I’m entitled to expect from life.
But
let's not talk about the past, what's done is done, and I should take care of
my present and most especially of my future, since the moment I’ve wished for and waited for has nearly came, or let us
say “ about to come”.
Still, what I have been able to see through my past, is that great deceit that still affects me. It is that deception, that I may have long forgotten, this deception caused by people I had so much affection for, this deception that is still in my today.
This profound deception has marked all my life, like a wound that's still bleeding and is wide open. It hurts me real bad even today, especially since I don't consciously relate to this painful past. And so there is a great bitterness that lays in me and invades my spirit.
This ancient pain, not healed, it’s more like a deadly poison much more serious than one can imagine, a deadly poison that paralyzes you and annihilates your faculties against difficulties. This is one of the fundamental reasons of my lack of positive personal potential and this is probably the real cause of all my current problems.
And yet I sometimes have some great moments of enthusiasm, but they are followed by hideous moments of profound discouragement. This is the sign where my past is trying to play tricks on me. I really have to eradicate these negative influences from my life if I want it to change, and for that I have decided to let go.
One has to say “ the more you live in unhappiness the more you attract misfortune.”
And what is odd about you myself, is that there is two things
opposed to one another that drive you, one of them is constantly winning on the
other and these two tendencies are conflicting, and that is blocking you from truly
enjoying your life.
Sometimes you seem to
resign, you seem to let things happen in such a way that you can't handle the slightest
difficulty. On the other hand, on other occasions you feel great, you have
flashes of lucidity and you are truly aware of the magnificent life you could
live if you knew how to seize all these occasions that are coming to you, all
these chances that are passing nearby.
But these positive moments are too short and the negative
elements quickly take over and block you from seeing and enjoying all the great
opportunities that would make the wonderful life you are dreaming of.
…
And for that I must let go of all the past, bad and good ! as I can’t risk it anymore. I really need to change to the better of whom I am ! I have to let go of the negativity winning over my true potentials !
